THINGS ARE CHANGING
I am sitting in a hotel in Logan Utah at this moment. I am looking out the window at the snow covered mountains and field between my hotel and the mountain and I am feeling so many things. I am excited for the upcoming move here. I am excited for Scott and Jen's wedding. I am happy about so many things. It is so weird that in the middle of all of the happy , goodness I feel a small tinge of sadness. I guess that is getting to be the "norm" for me now. I am sad to leave the place I grew up. I feel connected to my parents there. I am sad to leave my sister Lori and her kids. I am sad to leave behind memories of where I was married, and became a mother. I am sad that I look back to that time and it is like a movie of someone's life that I do not know. I thought this time in my life would be so different. I thought it would be family building, not rebuilding. I feel so alone and feel more and more alone as time goes. I am so proud of my kids. They are all so amazing and I
